What’s Stealing My Joy?

I realize why I’m not feeling as happy as I should. There are a few things in my life that are off-balance and I keep saying I’m going to fix it but procrastination has been my closest friend these past few months. So now is the time to end my friendship with procrastination and look for my old friend determination. I sat and analyzed what is really a sore point for me and has secretly been causing me mental grief that is spilling over into physical and emotional issues and came up with a list.

  1. my body – because of a neck injury I’m not able to do the type of exercise I want so I stopped exercising completely now I’ve gained weight which would be ok if all of it didn’t settle around my mid-section. I need to get back in shape.
  2. finances – I was in a physically and financially unhealthy relationship with my child’s father that left us semi-homeless (living in a motel) for about two months and caused severe damage to my credit so now that I’ve moved into my apt and bought my car cash my savings has dropped from thousands to a few hundreds and it’s giving me anxiety because I’m living paycheck to paycheck again and I hate it.
  3. side hustle – I’m still upset my first business venture didn’t work out but I understand the timing was off because everyone was going through financial troubles when the stock market was basically crashing and so many people were being laid off but I want to be an entrepreneur
  4. Avon – yes I’m a rep but this is not for me especially when I don’t get paid on time and since I hate owing people I pay the balance myself then wait for my customers to reimburse me and I realize every time the Avon boxes come I get upset so I think I may need to simply buy things for myself and give my customers to another rep
  5. apt – affordable, great location but not as comfortable socially because the landlord lives in the back yard so I’m always cautioning my daughter about playing in the back and making noise so she doesn’t go outside anymore. I want to move some where that she will have the freedom to be a kid and still be affordable for me.
  6. boyfriend – havent figured out why he is on this list but I know he should be here because there are times when I’m happy he’s not around

Now the list is not setup by importance or priority I’m using it to help me focus on the main parts of my life that are keeping me from being fully happy. The first and easiest thing for me to work on is my finances. I’m sure some may think Avon or my body would be the easiest choices but they aren’t and I’ll explain about that in another post. I’ve already started working on my finances by re-writing my budget and making myself save. I’ve figured out how much to put aside bi-weekly that will allow me to save $1,000 per year and have that amount of my pay check direct deposit into my savings account. I’m also looking for a new online savings account with a higher interest rate because Emigrant has dropped their interest rate from 3% all the way to 1% which sucks. When I handed in my payroll deduction sheet I felt at ease like finally I’m on my way back to financial freedom.

Well I’m off to study the rest of my list and come up with a specific goals to get what I need to bring my happy back. Then it’s off to enjoy this wonderful sunny weekend.  Have a great weekend everyone!!!

Published in: on October 23, 2010 at 11:48 am  Leave a Comment  

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