Pregnancy = Changes

I know there are changes that come with pregnancy after all I have two children now and there were many changes that occurred with the first pregnancy. I stopped smoking, reduced my drinking and drastically reduced my social outings which were major changes because during my twenties smoking, drinking and partying was my life. It also woke me up to the realization that I had to leave my abusive relationship or end up dead or worst my daughter would grow up thinking that abuse was a normal part of a relationship. These were mental permanent changes and the physical changes, weight gain, swelling etc., were temporary except for a few stretch marks. Now with my second pregnancy things were far from typical and completely different from the first. I still have certain food aversions and cravings, the weight isn’t coming off as quickly as it did in my twenties but the craziest change, is my shoe size has increased which has caused me some mental anguish.

I’m basically a shoe fanatic and my shoes are one aspect of my life where I do splurge. I have shoes that cost over $100 that I may now have to sell and give away because I can’t wear them. This may seem trivial to some people but buying shoes was the only thing I did for myself and I usually bought them as a reward for accomplishing goals in my life or just to pamper myself on my birthday. Now that I have two children my financial situation has obviously changed and spending $100+ on shoes is definitely out of the question. I still have to buy new shoes especially for work but it won’t be my comfort shoes. I’m estimating for the next four years my money is going to go towards bills and the kids so I’m going to be stuck buying practical shoes only. I have to give up shoes that represented milestones in my life and I won’t be able to celebrate new ones like I usually do so it depresses me. I know I can find other ways to celebrate but I can’t think of any right now that would give me the same pleasure.

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Published in: on May 10, 2012 at 12:40 pm  Leave a Comment  
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