Where Have I Been—-In Therapy

I pretty much hit rock bottom and the thoughts of suicide were becoming overwhelming. With two young children and no stable fathers in the picture I decided it was finally time to seek help. I have been seeing a therapist during my absence and its a very strange situation. I’m thoroughly against going on medication so we are doing talk therapy and trying to re-train my brain (as I refer to it) into processing situations as they happen and dealing in the present instead of trying to think 20 steps ahead and all the outcomes being worst than the last, in my mind that is.

Like I said it’s a struggle and I’m realizing a lot of the past that I buried deep in my mind has been severely affecting my present. I guess ignoring shit isn’t a legitimate way to deal with hurtful situations. I’m being forced to evaluate my irrational fears of inadequacy and failure and embracing the fact that my life isn’t as horrible as I constantly think it is. this is in hopes that I will not turn minor setbacks into tidal waves that lead to suicidal thoughts. My therapist suggested I find an outlet for my stress which is why I created my Facebook page. When I’m feeling overwhelmed I use it as a way turn my situation into something positive. Writing a positive post strangely causes me to feel better so I’m sticking with it until it stops working. I’ll post some of my post on here as well so I can hear from all of you.

Wish me luck because I have a very long way to go.

Published in: on May 18, 2014 at 6:43 pm  Leave a Comment  
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